BIG BLUES AND BAD BEHAVIOR?

Playing solitaire makes me feel like a mouse in a maze looking for cheese. Or so I imagine the frustration of repeatedly doing something for not such a big payoff. Maybe it relaxes me. It feels more like avoidance before some useful activity, treading water without benefit of calorie burning.

Yes, I am feeling a little cranky. I think it will pass. The continued rainy weather and occasional snow flurries do not lift my spirits into feeling the warmth and goodness of life. I need more light. More Vitamin D. I have managed, this week, to stave off any big blues and bad behavior, so I need to see the good in that.

Here's me looking for a silver lining: I came home from a Paul Krugman lecture and a birthday dinner for my friend Iris. I was all set to write, feeling rather groovy because I had been listening to the Los Lobos/Bobby Womack song, Wicked Rain/Across 110th Street, all the way home on my iPod. My homeboys of Whittier with Bobby singing about my adopted home town. And great musicianship. Made me cry.

Makes me digress. I tried turning on my laptop, the mothership unit still in sick bay. No go.
I waited a few minutes (shorter than it seemed, I am sure.) Tried again. Not even the pictogram of the file with a question mark. The grand nada.

Panic. No money. No computer. Shit. Despair. Terror. HASSLE!! I took meself to bed wherein I called my ever-patient mother to whine. And then I tossed and turned all night, berating myself, picturing various kinds of doom and misery. I dozed.

I got up. Computer turned on. Turned it off when I left. Same situation. Wouldn't start. And now here's the silver lining part you have waited for so patiently. When I got the computer on again, I immediately called Apple to see if this machine is still under warranty. Why yes. It is. For 55 more days. So, although there is a problem, it didn't happen 55 days from now.

So, that's accentuating the positive, right?