Thursday, May 5, 2016

RECKON IT READ

Yesterday was full of lost hours or jumps in time. 1 P.M. became 3:45, 10 P.M. became 12:40 A.M. while I was doing what? I had an insomnia scare, but instead of thrashing about, I chose to get up and take some sleeping medication rather than risk falling back into a negative Circadian rhythm.

It's quite overcast here today. The heat level is just below that which might make it uncomfortable. There's only a 20% chance of rain, but another shower or two would be so nice. I can hear Janet coughing in the backyard. Garden gazing is certainly preferable to listening to more endless awfulness about Donald Trump.

Why do I have such a bad feeling about this? My main reason must be that I imagine this is how Hitler got his start.

I'll go work on the monthly bills while we still have money.

Later that same day.

Jeebus. Life is frustrating. Verizon sold all of its business in California to a very crappy provider, Frontier. Of course, this is bound to be fraught with problems, so that wasn't the unexpected part. And even this current exasperating experience of having to call repeatedly after getting disconnected and endless wait times is not exactly surprising. The worst part is having them want me to go to the outside box and screw the cover and fool around with the fiber optic cable. I'm willing to unplug and replug in things in the house, but when I have to start rooting around for tools and bringing down the whole system in the house, I draw the line.

Okay. This isn't what I want to be doing, but on the positive side, I think I got all my mother's doctors appointments for the next month in my calendar and hers AND I switched my car insurance to this address, so that will save us a little bit of money each month.

Janet has been very wifty today. Yesterday, her eyes were red and swollen. Fortunately, her regular doctor's appointment is on Friday so we can see what's going on. She's coughing quite a bit, too. Perhaps it is just allergies as this area is on high alert for that, and our jacaranda tree has dropped blossoms all over the front yard, much to the annoyance of our bad next-door neighbor.

See how positive I am? Making good use of my wait by writing.

Much later.

Janet's aging and vulnerability took center stage today. Everything in life seems so transient and insubstantial. Then again, what is substantial? Substance? The hour is too late and laced with gin to dive into that, plus I would likely not end with the benefit of an answer should I query myself on that too hard. And I suppose I will better understand the substantial when my mother is gone.

At this point, I am on the good side of 1 A.M. so I should hit the hay (the hey!) as best I can, stop this all-too-human, all-too-large line of questioning. Meanwhile, Death Letter plays in the background.

I got a letter this morning
What do you reckon it read?
It said the gal you love is dead
I got a letter this morning
What do you reckon it read?
Said "Hurry, Hurry because the gal you love is dead"
Well I packed up my suitcase
I took off down the road
When I got there she was layin' on the cooling board
I packed up my suitcase
And I took off down the road
When I got there she was layin' on the cooling board
It looked like ten thousand people standing around the burial ground
I didn't know I loved her 'till they began to let her down
Looked like ten thousand people standing on the burial ground
I didn't know that I loved her 'till they began to let her down
You know it's so hard to love
Someone that don't love you
Won't get satisfaction
Don't care what you do
So hard to love
Someone that don't love you
Don't look like satisfaction
Don't care what you do
Well I got up this morning
The break of day
Just hugging the pillows
She used to lay
Got up this morning
The break of day
Just hugging the pillows

Where my baby used to lay




1 comment:

  1. I have exactly the same nightmarish feelings about Mr. Trump. Even if (!) the Dem's win...we've still got huge problems & all these nuts that just want to have little kid tantrum extreme "fixes." I was worried about the quality of education in America, but this evidence of extreme pervasive immaturity amidst all the nearby violence committed by meth-impaired gamblers from the Fed. Govt.-enabled 24-hr Chumash Casino 5 blocks away and our Mexican Mafia-overrun local gang city, Santa Maria, to our north that one must drive through on our dangerous 101 Autobahn to go anywhere north of here... Not conducive to good sleep!

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