I had a better than okay birthday. Janet did not know it was my birthday, as she has a hard time with dates in general these days. I chose to not remind her until very late. First time in my life and probably hers that she didn't remember.
KMH and I went on a bit of a thrifting excursion to great effect and hauled some nice items, not too many. These vintage vases were the best of the lot and they are mighty fine. These were funded by a sweet gift from CB and JH. There were other gifts, cards, and many wishes, so thank you to every one who connected with me.
I feel quite weighted down, as if I am swimming upstream but mostly drowning. I am pretty sure I get in my own way, but I lack the perspective to really turn it around. Today, on the stationary bike, I desperately wanted to stop before my goal time. I was antsy and miserable. I did my 60 minutes. I have to look hard to see that I have made any progress.
Maybe I am just in need of a break. And I will get that break in two weeks when I go up to Oakland (another birthday present). Meanwhile, it is day by day, hour by hour, bird by bird.
LES NATURES
PROFONDEMENT BONNES SONT
TOUJOURS INDECISES
One strong squirt
of will and the world
fills with direction.
All roads go Roman.
The path not taken
is not kept open.
There is suddenly
a rational waterworks
system. Things are done
as no indecisive person
could do them. Still
there is a population
that likes mistakes and
indecision, guarding
atavisms and anatomical
sports, the hips of snakes,
the wings of the horse.
They do not argue that
this is useful. They
make no mention of the
gene pool. They just
like to think about
these things. They
make them comfortable.
— Kay Ryan, The Best of It: New and Selected, New York, Grove Press, 2010
"...the hips of snakes..."
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