GONE AND CHANGING?

I wasn't going to write this morning. There are days when I do get out of bed and right down to it, and days when, well, even caffeine doesn't quite cut the fog. I'm not sure, but maybe it is lifting. This apartment building is old enough so that I can hear the sounds of the upstairs neighbors, my friends, getting ready to get out: water running, footsteps, chairs moving, doors opening. In my own little corner of the world, Cooder and Emmylou have already sparred and spatted, and are now sleeping peacefully nearby, Cooder in her favorite rocking chair, Emmylou here on the dining room table (where she is not supposed to be) in the pool of light from a desk lamp.

It's rainy and grey on a morning I was expecting and planning on sun so that I could photograph some items for eBay posting tonight. Thanks to some of you, I had a leettle more cash, and could take a week off of the eBay rat race. Oh well, I will figure out something I guess.

On the good side, even though I can hear the wolves in the forest, I am sleeping fairly well. If the wake-up-drums had not gone off, I would probably still be cozily ignoring the alarms of my reality. I suppose research studies are not necessary to understand the human compulsion to curl up in non-sunny weather.

One of my usual suspects is on a Neil Young tear. When this friend gets focussed on something, just watch out, as there will be a barrage of youtube videos and related references to whatever is the current obsession. Mind you, I am nearly always interested and welcome the discoveries. On my recent trip to Rhinebeck, I grabbed After the Gold Rush to listen to in the car. I listened to it two or three times straight through (remember when we had turn over the record?). And this morning, I woke up with I Believe In You echoing around:

Now that you found yourself
losing your mind
Are you here again?
Find what you once 
thought was real
is gone, and changing?

Somehow that must resonate both with my current state of stress and confusion relating to how to get a job in this world which seems to me to have changed in indecipherable ways.