Game
mechanics are based on the need to know: What you need to know in order to
succeed is the most important kind of knowledge, and that’s not something
someone else can tell you. You have to decide what you need to know and how to
obtain the knowledge. The world isn’t multiple-choice. Sometimes defining the
question is even harder than answering the question you come up with.
— Cathy N.
Davidson, Now You See It
There are ways that this describes parts of my life, or my particular stage in life. The business I have worked in for almost 30 years has changed significantly. I was even part of that change, having been one of the first producers of computer-generated images for commercial uses. Early adopter of digital media, that's me. And although I have kept up more than some, I am not as savvy and computer-literate as the young up-and-comers. What is it that I need to know to get another good gig? Is it an aside or it is germane, that I have not been wholly certain in lo! these many years what I actually wanted to do. Nor did I take any pride in what I was really good at.
I've never been good at nor did I want to be a salesperson. Well, I was good at selling baby clothes at Sears in my college years, but that aside. But one has to be able to sell one's abilities if not oneself, right?
So, now I am struggling, and have been for awhile, to rewrite my life and my resume to make me a prime catch candidate. And that has been hard.
I love this Cathy Davidson book. Here's another important idea in a section where she describes the sport of parcours/parkour:
You train in groups so you can learn from one another not only techniques but your own weaknesses. Left to your own devices, you can miss your own weaknesses until it is too late. You rely on your training partners to help you improve your skills so that you don't take foolhardy risks. ... Parkour requires you to pay attention to all the things you normally take for granted. It tests you in situations where nothing can be taken for granted.
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| Emmylou trains with a friend. |
I am thinking these days that little in life can or should be taken for granted. But I haven't found the culture or the work environment such that the idea of training with and for one another was espoused. I think I have a few friends and colleagues (yay!) that are unconsciously on-board with these practices, but no one signs up and commits in real-time life. All ad hoc and on a case by case basis.
There's a person whom I have considered a good solid, if not always close friend, who recently ... derided if not bad-mouthed me and my work to friend in common. I am still at a bit of a loss as to how to address this issue ... and I do think I need to address it. At a very basic level, doesn't it indicate a remarkable disregard for my well-being? I mean, it is a tough market out there and I am in serious need of work. If he had such reservations about my work wouldn't it be kinder to say something to me? None of us needs undermining at this point. Was he just being capricious, cavalier, childish, and shallow? None of these answers speak very well of him. Or maybe I misjudged him and he's actually a dick.
I don't know. But he is certainly not a training partner in life/work who is interested in helping me improve my skills.
Wish I knew anything about animation or gaming or something or had some connections. But I don't. Alex did parcour for awhile, which scared me half to death. At least I never saw him do it!
ReplyDeleteAs for your detractor, I often find that people feel they are rising if they make others fall. I don't understand it, but it does happen. I don't know what to do about it but to have confidence that the karma/dharma does balance out, usually too late to do us any good. As you know, I am no good at self promotion.
I have been praised by friends for doing exactly the same thing (I thought) that I was criticized for by other, equally close friends. Made me think I didn't have the whole picture as to A. what I was doing, and B. what they meant. So, I took pride in the praise and filed for permanent reference, & self-observation, the criticism, and remained cautious and not entirely trusting of the critics' friendship, though they've hung in as friends over the years, so who knows why another feels it necessary to criticize, especially behind one's back? A bad day maybe? Something else going on for them? // ...I know two (autistic) kids who are geniuses, I am told, at computer games & animation, and one creative young woman who writes music for games, but I am clueless. //...Charlotte was quite taken with parcour for awhile too, but luckily, after getting famously in trouble for being up on the school roof, she lost interest.
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