Saturday, March 26, 2011

DURéE ET DORéE

Birthday eve, but just barely. I had plans to be introspective and treat this occasion as another kind of New Year with a stock-taking and some resolutions. But, alas or not, this is not to be.

When I worked in publishing, back in the late 1970s, I met a woman, Martha, who is, to this day a dear and close friend. Martha married another workmate of ours, Jay, who was from Westchester, NY, and they settled there. Their oldest, Brett, was born on March 29th, two days after my birthdate. They had two beautiful daughters, Anna and Emily. Brett now lives in Williamswick/Bushburg. His girlfriend, Allison, lives about four blocks away from me in Windsor Terrace.

Well, they all converged here in Park Slope for presents and dinner. For a single person, without children, there is something pretty wonderful about the love, affection, and respect of your dear friend's children. That the friendship you might have nurtured and cherished for years can translate across generations. And all the kids clearly have affection and respect for the relationship that Martha and I and Martha and Jay and I have. I am kind of an "auntie," but also an esteemed and valued person in my own right. All of us, Brett, Anna, Emily, and even Allison, and I have our own relationships.

All I can say is that it feels good.

Maybe we can make our own families out of more than just blood and traditional kinship. There is a kinship of like minds, history, and durée. Oh, and did I forget to mention love?


2 comments:

  1. LOVEly, Sally. I hope you have a sweet birthday today.

    ReplyDelete
  2. As an adoptive parent, and having grown up in a family with many unofficial "adoptees" who are siblings in all but blood and legal papers, to this day, I would definitely agree with your last paragraph.

    ReplyDelete

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