THE CONFINES OF MY CURRENT SITUATION

Getting up this morning was another “crawling from the wreckage” experience. There was gory dream if not an actual nightmare.

There’s always so much to do. Even trying to sit down and write is daunting in the face of what? The all of it out there in the world. My news alerts were chock full of Supreme Court decisions, Congressional sit-ins, and killing endangered wildlife. I guess human beings are relentlessly stupid. I should just get over and march through my remaining days as best I can.

In general, in the overall, things have been a bit better. Ms. Scotch is recovering quite well and even being a bit friendlier, at least part of the time. My conflicts with Janet have lessened, her memory deterioration seems to be remission, and she has been active in going to the Senior Center for lunch and dominoes more days out of the week than not.

Monday was crushingly hot. Our electricity was out for several hours. Janet was out with her friends, so I headed over to the city pool where I could cool down even if I couldn’t swim laps. The pool was crowded but the crowd was affable so it was pleasant. I wish I had had a buddy there to chat with me as there was nothing to really do in the water. Fortunately, the heat broke and we are back to plain hot.

There is much to do before I take Janet to the dentist this afternoon. Many many doctors appointments. My garden needs attention and to that end I did go out and buy fertilizer and compost to shore them up.

I do not seem to be able to get to bed before one o’clock and, if I do sleep, I don’t wake up for eight or nine hours which means it is too hot to garden by the time I get up. At this time of year, there is sun in most of the yard until evening. But I do want to improve my gardening game.

Actually, what I really want to do is to escape back to unconsciousness, but I know, like drinking too much or any other escape, that it will not be better when reality sets in again.

Okay, now to more caffeine and some progress! And to remember and smile at the grace of everyone who helped me with Butterscotch. 

The kitten is still unnamed and getting big.

Before I sign off, I want to also be grateful for my friend J who has had a terribly difficult year and his continued decision to stay in the game. For drinking wine spritzers and watching bad television with PAS. For a lovely wine fueled dinner with R, L, and J. Just trying to focus on the positive and see if that works. And to all of you for hanging in there with me.